I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
