I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
