that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
