Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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