Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
