my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
