After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
