i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
