Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
