Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize