just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
