You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
