I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Randomize
