i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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