Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Randomize
