Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
