lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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