Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
