would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
