he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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