i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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