Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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