I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize