Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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