I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
