i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
