Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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