Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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