and you said cock pushups were impossible
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
