you guys were way drunker than both of me
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
