I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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