sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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