from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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