Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
