Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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