Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
