I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
