he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
