i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
