last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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