Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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