All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize