I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
