Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
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