it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize