he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
