the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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