The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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