No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
