I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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